Soldier Psycosis
by Enide Dear
Summary: Sephiroth goes insane once a year...


Title: Enide Dear

Author: Soldier's Psychosis

Pairing: ZackxSephiroth

Rating: insane Sephiroth, what do you think?

Summary: Sephiroth breaks down

A/N: Dedicated to ten-tackle for winning the 30 000 kiriban! The prompt was ZackxSephiroth and Psycotic. I'm sure this wasn't at all what you had in mind ^^;

There's nothing more than you can do

This maniac is in love with you

Your biggest fear has just come true

This maniac is in love with you!

This maniacs in love, Alice Cooper

The crashes echoed through the entire ShinRa building; strange loud crashes, the violent screeching of tortured glass, the mechanical roar of some sort of machine, the sloshing of tidal waves of water spilling over. Zack grew cold with dread as came running around a corner towards the sound, dodging between terrified ShinRa personnel running in the opposite direction. The sounds were coming from the Solider First Class Floor, and that could only mean trouble. Trouble in the world-destruction size.

"Stop, puppy. No one is allowed in there." A big hand held up before him made Zack come to a skidding halt; the chill inside him building to glacial proportions as he saw the furrowed, worried face of his mentor. He'd never seen Angeal look this frightened.

Genesis was standing next to him, sword in hand but looking ready to bolt as he kept throwing glances over his shoulder down the corridor to the First's room. That was almost as worrying as Angeal showing fear; Genesis' arrogance and faith in his Godess usually held through any situation.

The strange sounds were much, much higher now, making Zack have to yell.

"What is going on here?! Are we under attack?"

"Go away, Zack! This is no place for a 2 grade Soldier!" Angeal scowled at him, but Zack held his ground.

"I can help!"

"There's nothing we can do." Genesis was chewing his lower lip in nervousness. "Except make sure no one enters until this has all blown over. It usually takes all day."

"What do you mean?"

"This happens once a year." Angeal peered cautiously down the hall where once again the sound of glass being pushed to its limits and howling in protest could be heard.

"Oh Godess, he's on the windows now." Genesis whined, clutching his sword harder. "It's about to reach climax."

"But we're Soldiers!" Zack insisted, holding on to his own courage as best he could. What was that terrible *sucking* mechanical sound? "We can put a stop to this! Sephiroth can…."

"Sephiroth is the creator of this madness!" Genesis threw up his hands in despair. "The lodestone of this…this…chaos!"

"Look, puppy." Angeal put a comforting hand on Zack's shoulder as the younger man grew pale with worry. "I know you look up to the man, but Sephiroth is…he isn't completely mentally stable. And it builds up over the months. Be glad he only snaps once a year."

"He's gone insane?" Zack whispered, his voice giving out. "But I never knew…"

From down the corridor it sounded like furniture was being torn to pieces. A strong chemical smell impregnated the air making it hard to breathe.

"ShinRa keeps a tight lid on this. We can't let it get out that our greatest hero is…slightly psychotic."

"A full-fledged maniac, you mean." Genesis muttered.

"Genesis!" Angeal gave him an angry stare as Zack seemed to crumble with the harsh words on his idol.

"What? It's true and you know it." All three of them had to suddenly cover their ears as another tidal wave of water crashed against the walls and trickled out the corridor. Their boots were getting wet.

Zack suddenly looked up, his shiny eyes lit with youthful worry and determination.

"Then we have to help him! We have to go in there and talk to him!" Zack grabbed Angeal's sword -straps. "We can make him come to his senses – I know it!"

"Are you out of your bloody mind? I heard Tseng went in there once to try to talk to him. Took the poor man weeks to recover." Genesis snarled. "And Tseng's a Hell of a lot harder man than you are, kid!"

"But I'm his friend." Zack unstrapped his sword. "He won't hurt me, not if I come unarmed, he'll listen to me, I know it. I can save him!"

"Don't be ridiculous, Zack." Angeal sighed. "We're not letting you go in there. We have our orders. Go away. This will all be over by tomorrow and then we'll send in a rescue team. Go out and enjoy the nice spring day outside. Your hero will be alright soon enough."

"But he's more than my hero!" Zack screamed in despair, trying without success to push through the two First Class. "He's my friend, and I …I love him."

Angeal dropped his jaw, but not his grip on Zack's arm. Genesis was about to say something scalding to the blushing boy, but all of them were interrupted by a gust of wind that almost knocked them over. Scrambling to retain balance they spun around, to see a huge cloud of silvery dust come rushing towards them, gaining momentum as it approached, a faint but very disturbing *swishing* sound as of feathers from deep within.

"Damn, here he comes!" Genesis voice almost broke and he yanked Zack from Angeal's grip. "Here, take him!" With surprising strength for one so lithe, he tossed Zack down the corridor towards the cloud of destruction.

"Zack!" Angeal's terrified scream was the last thing Zack heard before he tore through the silver specks and scrambled to his hands and knees, sneezing and coughing and rather belatedly realizing that the cloud of silver dust was indeed made up by…dust.

A black boot came within his sight and he looked up, trying to repress his fears. Cold green eyes, shining with fanatic light, stared down on him. Sephiroth prodded him in the chest with something held in his hand.

"On your knees. I want you to beg for forgiveness." The voice was cold, crackled around the edges with insanity. "You've dragged filth all over my newly washed floor!"

Zack's jaw dropped. Sitting back he realized that Sephiroth was – for the first time Zack's ever seen – not dressed in his usual leather. Instead he wore what appeared to be some rather dusty and dirty slacks, an old t-shirt, and over it all, an apron. His long hair was tied back under a scarf and bundled up so it wouldn't get dirty. The thing in his hand that he kept prodding Zack's chest with and that was responsible for the feathery sounds, was a feather duster.

"I…what?" Zack tried, but was driven back by two meters of dirty silver psychosis. Sephiroth's face turned dark and the feather duster was raised threateningly. "Alright, alright, I'm sorry!" Zack managed as the wall bounced against his back. "What the hell are you doing, Sephy?"

"It's spring." The war hero put his hands on his hips and jerked his head towards the windows where the fresh crisp spring light poured in through windows that had been cleaned with such obsession that is was doubtful if they retained more than a molecule's thickness. "I'm spring cleaning, what does it look like?!"

Zack threw a glance at the floor of the apartment's kitchen, covered with two centimeters of soapy water. In the adjourning room, what appeared to be an industrial size vacuum cleaner howled as it tried to suck its way through the carpet. Several pieces of furniture had been polished with such enthusiasm as to break or bend.

Zack opened his mouth to say something, but quickly swallowed it again. You didn't mess with the cracked lightning sparkling in those eyes.

"You are – ah – doing a lovely work. I've never seen an apartment looking so clean before." That was probably true. Any dirt that dared face the wrath of Sephiroth had long since been defeated. The man cleaned like he fought.

The warrior relaxed a fraction.

"You wouldn't believe how dirty the place gets." He said softly, his gaze lost in the distance. " I'm sure Mother wouldn't approve."

"Mother?"

"Hm?" Sephiroth seemed to snap back from wherever his mind had wondered, back to the spring cleaning fanatic. "Good you are here. I need some help." He grabbed Zack by the collar ever as the boy tried to shuffle away. "You can start by cleaning out the oven, I'm sure Tseng left much to wished for last year, those Turks, no stamina, a few hours of scrubbing and they faint…"

"No, Sephy, I'm not…I don't want to… I have practice…" all of Zack's protests went unheard as he was dragged towards the ruined apartment. "Angeal, heeeeeelp!"


End file.
